Let’s face it, if you discount the private jets, the seemingly unlimited resources, the constant paparazzi presence, and the highly-stage-managed “outings”, celebrities are just like us! And just like us, every once in a while they forget that when spending time outdoors, applying or re-applying sunscreen is an essential practice. And also just like us, they get it wrong. A lot.
So for your entertainment, here are six instances of celebrities totally dropping the ball with their sunscreen game. The results range from embarrassing to downright painful. Let this be a reminder to us all that when enjoying the great outdoors this summer, sunscreen is not an optional item, but rather an essential one.
Tom Hiddleston
You would think that as stage-managed as the whole Tiddles affair appears to be, Taylor Swift would have hired someone whose sole function is to periodically rub sunscreen on her new boyfriend’s rather vast expanse of forehead. Tom is both British and a redhead, so he has double the need to lather himself in SPF 9 million. After all, a few more sunburns like this, and that 10 year age gap between these two is going to be even more apparent than it already is. Seriously you guys, it looks like he’s babysitting in this photo…but I digress. From where I’m sitting, this is a pretty big omission in Taylor’s usual watertight PR wrangling game. If she’s going to spend hundreds of thousands to fly this guy all over the world in her private jet, why not spend the extra few bucks and buy the man some sunscreen!?
Miley Cyrus
Okay, we’ve all done this one. Even when the rest of you doesn’t burn, even when you have SPF on the entirety of your body, these are the bits that need a little extra coverage. Boobs and shoulders stick out, and tend to absorb more rays than other parts of the body, so even though you may feel like you’re covered, these parts need an extra coating or two, especially when you’re in the water.
Kelly Osbourne
Even though this is a grainy iPhone photo, this looks incredibly painful, and quite frankly, neglectful. If you look closely, you can see that Osbourne is so burned, you can barely see her tattoos! Like Hiddleston, Osbourne is of British descent, and as such, needs to slather on a healthy coating of SPF 11 kajillion. It looks here as if she has used a bit of leftover olive oil scraped from the bottom of the salad bowl after she polished-off the last of her caprese at lunch – not a good look.
Jaime King
At first, I figured Jaime King’s” tan” in this photograph was the product of a spray tan gone wild, but upon closer inspection, I realized that the kind of reddish patina that her skin has can only be the product of too much natural ultraviolet radiation. Not only does the reddish tone of Ms. King’s skin look even more pronounced in that green dress, she appears to be proud of it, and is wearing basically a “formal” version of a bandeau swimming suit with a beach cover-up. Or perhaps she literally just came from the beach. Either way, someone please point this woman in the direction of the sunscreen aisle at her local drugstore. It looks as if she’s going to start to peel any minute now, which I’m pretty sure they frown upon on the red carpet.
Kim Kardashian
This is an older photo of Kardashian, as evidenced by her old (not original, mind you, just older) nose. Perhaps this photo was taken back in the days before Kardashian was as aesthetic surgery-obsessed as she is today, or perhaps this was just “one of those things”. Either way you slice it, this one is a real ouch-fest. As the story goes, Kardashian apparently fell asleep in the sun, although with her colouring, surely had she been wearing some proper sunscreen this misstep would not have been so pronounced? Be that as it may, if anyone can cover this misstep with bucketloads of foundation and layers of contouring, Team Kardashian can.
Christina Ricci
Okay, she may not be British or a redhead like some of our other lobster-esque celebs, but Christina Ricci was chosen to play Wednesday Adams all those years ago for a reason – she has that porcelain pallor and dark hair that play well in a “goth” type of role. But however beneficial her natural colouring may be for casting purposes, it also means that she is yet another celebrity that needs to reach for the SPF 50 trillion when she is going to spend any amount of time outdoors, and re-apply it frequently. It’s safe to say here that she looks pretty well-done.
I would also add to the bad idea files the obvious use of pink blusher on the apples of her cheeks and fuchsia lipstick on her lips. She should probably sue whatever makeup artist did that to her. Adding more red tones to your face after you’ve burnt yourself to oblivion is never a great idea. See how that fuchsia lipstick makes you notice her red cheeks and décolletage all the more? Yep. Me too. If this happens to you (and it won’t because you will remember your sunscreen), tone it down as best you can with a green-based moisturiser, even it out with bronzer, a little natural taupe or coral gloss, add mascara, and then for God’s sake, leave it alone!
